The Common Man, Uncommonly Bad
Mrs. Rants sent this letter to The Common Man restaurant, Concord NH.
My husband and I visited your Concord restaurant on 8-29 for dinner. I can't recall the name of the server we had, but it was a young man and we were seated upstairs in the lounge at about 5:30.I wanted to share with you a really weird and annoying experience we had.I'd like to say the events described were the extent of the uncomfortable experience. However, much to our horror in walks a college acquantance we both had not seen in years (which was fine by us)! The subject of (no)interest did not see us, but all through the meal Mrs. Rants and I ate distractedly, hoping to remain unnoticed. We scanned what exits were available to us, and after paying our bill we picked a moment when a large group entered the dining room to be seated, using the crowd to block any view of us and we skiddadled out of there successfully.
I am visibly pregnant and in my 3rd trimester. As soon as we sat down, our server said "We love pregnant women here at the Common Man!" Odd. He took our drink order, giving a rundown of all the non-alcoholic drinks you have to offer. I ordered an iced tea, as did my husband. Then, the young man turned to me and said "I know you can't but..." Then turned to my husband and proceeded to tell him about the daily wine special. Wait a second, "I can't?" Is it Common Man policy to bar pregnant women from enjoying a glass of wine? Our server left, and returned a few minutes later to take our dinner order. I got just an entree, while my husband got an entree and a salad. He then turned to me and said "I would like to suggest to you our summer salad..." and told me about a salad with berries and fruit on top. I said no thank you because I am unable to eat large meals at this stage of my pregnancy. He then said that that was ok, because this salad aided in digestion, and was full of antioxidants that were good for the baby. "After all" he said, "she is eating for two!" and winked at my husband. You have got to be kidding me!
I was pretty irritated by the server's constant referral to my pregnancy. Sometimes, we pregnant women like to go out into the world and not be treated walking womb. We don't like unsolicited nutritional advice, we don't like to be treated "special". We certainly don't like to be told we are "eating for two". The health of my baby is between my OB/GYN and myself. Whether or not I drink alcohol is none of the Common Man's business or the business of my 20-something waiter.
If it is your policy to treat pregnant women "special," I am telling you, please DON'T! We put up with enough questions strange comments, and unwanted advice from friends, loved ones and coworkers to really tire of it. Just server dinner with a smile and refill the water glasses please. Very simple.
Please talk with your waitstaff about proper ettiquite when serving pregnant women. After all, I suspect you wouldn't treat someone in a wheelchair differently than anyone else.